An afternoon in Burma

I'll be the first to admit that I know absolutely nothing about Myanmar, other than prior to 1989 it was known as Burma and that its military dictatorship has been creating misery for its own people, and neighbors, for decades. So, when I heard a rumor that you could actually cross into Burma (the name preferred by the country's democracy movement) from Thailand, my curiosity was piqued. Turns out that the border between Mae Sai, Thailand and Tachilek, Burma was open to foreigners on the condition that you pay a $10 fee, leave your passport with the Burmese immigration officials (ostensibly to keep you from wandering off and stirring up trouble), and leave within 24 hours of your arrival. Realistically, this limits you to Tachilek although, I had also heard that two-week visas are occasionally available depending upon the whims of the government - but even then you are severly limited as to where and how you can travel. On top of all that, the entire border is occasionally locked down depending on the security situation of the day. Rebels operate in the area and Burma has even lobbed shells over the border into Mae Sai when fighting erupts.

After checking to see whether a crossing was possible this week (it was) I jumped a local bus for the hour and half ride north of Chiang Rai. Mae Sai is the northernmost town in all of Thailand and, it turns out, a pretty hopping place thriving on the legal and illegal trade in goods coming from nearby China (via Burma). Thousands of well-to-do Thais walk across the border everyday to shop in the markets of Tachilek and the whole city has been made into a sort of free-economic zone with huge duty free shops and just about everything...and I mean everything....you can imagine for sale.

Knowing full well that I wouldn't see anything remotely related to the "real" Burma in this border town, I decided to go anyway. Yes, I felt slightly guilty about giving my entry fee to the dictatorship, but I also hoped that once inside I could spread a bit of baht to others in genuine need. The border crossing was surprisingly efficient - Thais had their streamlined procedure - and I was pulled aside into a small office where I gave up my passport in exchange for a small, computer generated "day pass" complete with my photo. My 10 US dollar bills were completely unacceptable, however, because of some small ink stains, so I had to fork over 500 baht instead - a $5 penalty. After being ticked off for a few minutes, I consoled myself with the thought that at least I hadn't provided the government with hard US currency. And with that, I was off, free to roam for the day.....sort of.

I may have imagined it, but Burma - even so close to the Thai border in Tachilek - has a very strange, disconcerting feel to it. A lot of that likely has to do with the fact that it is a sort of wild-west border town where I'm pretty sure anything goes, if you look hard enough. But I also felt like I was being watched closely. The locals were friendly enough - several exceedingly so - but it wasn't long before I was being yelled at by a uniformed (police? military?) guy for walking down the wrong street. Likewise, in the market, a young woman screeched at me for taking a photo of her shop - lined, as it was, from wall to wall with animal parts (9/10 of which, I'm certain, violated CITES - the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species). She demanded that I delete the photo and when I asked what would happen if I didn't she replied that her boss would "abuse" her. So I made a big show of erasing the photo, which seemed to make her happy - of course, I had actually taken two photos.

The market itelf was a madhouse - shoulder to shoulder with shopping Thais and selling Burmese. Loads of junk and knockoffs of designer labels from China mixed in with the dead animals mentioned above. Monkey skulls, tiger skins, bear claws, turtle shells, and some sort of dried up testicles seemed to be in high demand. I got the feeling that if I had only known who to ask I could have found an AK-47 or rocket launcher, as well. The biggest headaches were the roaming vendors selling decks of girlie cards, contraband cigarettes, Viagra and Cialis. Everywhere I went I was being offered Viagra at cut rate prices.....after a while, you start to develop a bit of a complex concerning your manhood. And then, as always, there were the whispered offers of opium, heroin, hashish, and hookers. Since Burmese prisons sound even less appealing than their Thai counterparts, I obviously passed.

However, once I broke away from the scrum and walked a few blocks off the river, everything changed. Tachilek became just another small, dusty Southeast Asian town. The locals, many of their faces smeared with thenaka (a powder made from tree bark - initially worn as sun protection, now apparently a fashion statement), seemed a little reserved, possibly just not used to seeing many white-skinned foreigners. The men all wore longyis, a type of wrap-around skirt, and I noticed more Muslims - given away by skullcaps and veiled women - in this small town than anywhere else on my entire trip so far. Makes sense when you consider the huge border Burma shares with both Bangladesh and India. I was also surprised to see so many Christian-denomination churches. Apparently the Catholics and Baptists have been in Burma for a while, and allowed to stay by the current dictatorship.

But the hightlight of my trip was running into "Barak Obama" (I've never felt the need to make up an alias for someone I've met before - that's Burma for you). As I was walking, I was a little apprehensive to see this disheveled, obviously poor guy come up along side of me. But then he started talking to me in perfectly fluent English. It turns out that yes, Barak is poor and completely down on his luck - no wife, no family, can't afford to see the doctor for his latest bout of malaria (he's sure that's what he has) but he's also a college educated engineer who traveled the world working on ships until something happened 10 years ago. Given the government's orders against talking politics with foreigners, I didn't push the issue but I have the feeling that Barak was (or is) a part of the pro-democracy opposition. He even appologized for not being able to discuss the current regime, although a few curses here and there made it obvious how he feels. Anyway, Barak took me around to the few "sights" that Tachilek has to offer and told me all about his take on religion (born a Buddhist, he converted to Catholicism), the history of Burma (in a politically-correct way, of course), the places he's traveled to (including New York and San Francisco) and the philosophy manuscript he's written and hopes to publish in Thailand someday. He just laughed when I suggested he publish it in Burma. He also described the travel restrictions he has to deal with in his own country - going to visit his sister in Yangoon proves to be such a red-tape nightmare that he hasn't been in years.

After a few hours, it was time to run the gauntlet of viagra salesmen back to the border if I wanted to catch the last bus to Chiang Rai. I handed Barak a small wad of cash and said goodbye, wishing that I could have learned more about this bizarre and troubled country - and that Barak would have felt safe in speaking freely about Burma. But that's not the way it works, and for his own good, we had to leave it at that. If nothing else, my very quick glimpse at the country has persuaded me to learn more and, oh yes, the cogwheels are turning in my head. I'll be back someday.